What if PDA Joined?: "Getting Teardrop To Talk"

A fork flies through the air.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10—

The fork pops Bubble, she gets recovered.

Wow, Bubble, it's so cool that you get your very own recovery center!

Thoinks! (another fork pops Bubble)

Hey, who, like, keeps popping Bubble? Hmm.

Let's find out.

The alliance finds Book watching Cake and Pie playing tic-tac-toe.

Book! Help us find a criminal.

No thanks! I'm good!

If you don't, we just might have to expel you from our alliance.

But I'm an alternate, right?

Hmph!

Oh my gosh, I won! Sorry, Pie. No hard feelings, right?

Whatever. You win some, you lose some.

Now that's a good way to look at it!

Naily, did you pop Bubble?

No.

Sounds like a lie to me. Liars must be punished! (picks up Naily) Let’s punish Naily!

Oh my gosh, NAILY!

AAAnd, I'm going to have to stop you right there.

Wha-... and why should I listen to you? I don't even know who you are.

Well, I'm going to have to play it safe with you and bite the bullet with you, because I have to admit, you are a feisty one.

That's a way to describe me. Anyways, don't care. Lightning, punish Naily!

Are you sure I should-

Just, like, do it!

Okay.

Lightning zaps Naily, as she screams while PDA watches the scene unfold.

Everyone watching them Yeah!

And that is why you never disobey Pencil! It does nothing.

I'm sorry, but is it my fault I want to test you all out like dummies? Seriously, every single one of you is the same! I can't anymore, man! I swear.

Hey! Who are you?

One, PDA, and two, what on Earth do you need me for?

We gotta get Teardrop to talk. I see her standing there silent for hours, I wanna know what's going on inside her head.

(in her mind) LOSER...

I have to admit, I am curious as well.

You're curious too? That's good to know. Well, I'll hold Teardrop's jaw open and you'll wiggle her vocal cords, so that they make noise.

Oh, wait, is this something we're actually doing? Like, right now? Okay, then. Not what I was thinking of.

Liy and PDA sneak up to Teardrop when she isn't looking, and both come close to Teardrop. Liy immediately holds Teardrop's jaw open and PDA wiggles her vocal cords.

So, is this something research related? Orr... is it just for the love of the game?

For research, me and Pillow have been conducting it for the past few months. About Teardrop's secrets, all of it.

Oh! Uhh... cool.

Why are you condoning Ice Cube's brutal abuse of innocent Teardrop?

I hate you!

Yeah, I do too.

No, I hate YOU!

Wha- Why would you hate me? I'm just tryin' to stand up for Teardrop!

Because self-improvement only occurs when we acknowledge that our own behaviors are far from perfect, and, dare I say, worthy of hate.

Does that mean we all hate each other?

If you think so, yes!

I'm actually more concerned about Teardrop right now if I'm being honest, Liy! Whoever that other person is... cease the torment!

The name's PDA, now can you stop asking?!

No! And, PDA will stop when they want to stop!

Which is NEVER!

See, Clock? They'll never agree with whatever you have to say, I bet Icy wouldn't, either!

The words "I bet Icy wouldn't, either!" echo out to Ice Cube and Book by the bathrooms.

Wha?

Ice Cube, do you know who that was? It sounded like Liy, I'm pretty sure.

Ice Cube looks at Liy and PDA mess with Teardrop, as Clock argues with Liy back and forth.

Umm, gotta go!

Wait, no! Ice Cube! COME BACK!

Book chases after Ice Cube as the scene cuts to Clock and Liy arguing, this time being less muffled.

(Simultaneous with Liy) Liy! Stop! This isn't helping, and is making everything worse for Teardrop and her well-being! It's time to put this to an end!

(Simultaneous with Clock) This took MONTHS and MONTHS to research, I'm not listening to you! Blah, blah, blah, enough of that talk! Let me and PDA do what we have to do!

Both of you, CUT IT OUT! Especially YOU, Liy! You've been yelling so loud next to me! I feel like I'm going DEAF!

EXCUSE ME?!

Teardrop gets stabbed by an incoming fork as she bites down on PDA's legs, and then letting go of them.

Teardrop slaps both Clock & Liy, then storms off.

Well, I think we both wronged Teardrop today. Truce? (holds out her hand) Truce? Clock, it's not that hard. just shake my hand.

Oh! Uhh... I can, Liy.

I know, but I'm making sure Clock can shake my hand.

Liy reaches for Clock's clock hands.

Don't you ticking dare touch my clock hands!

Clock raises his foot and Liy is shaking it.

(Shown in her BFDI assets) Hey guys! Can I be part of (Ice Cube suddenly switches to her BFB assets) ·the truce· (switches back to the BFDI style) too?

Icy joins hands/feet with Liy and Clock.

Yay!

So I'm excluded out of the truce now?!

What? No. Of course not, here, you can shake my hand, PDA!

Urgh, okay.

PDA shakes Liy's hand and forms the full truce.

(Breathing heavily) Sorry, I had to run an awful lot just to come here. And, why is Ice Cube with these strangers? C'mon, Icy! Come over-

No!

What? Why not? I've always been by your side!

Book, I think it's pretty clear that she wants to be with us instead. If you want to see her, see her some other time.

Ppshh, calling us strangers when I have no idea who YOU are...

Speak for yourself! I've never met you in my entire life.

That's what they always say.

Liy! PDA! Ice Cube! All of you, cut it out! If Book is having a tough time, we should include her as well!

I mean, okay. Just, not in the handshake though, alright?

Now that's something I can agree with.

Ugh.

What's the matter Book, need a helping hand? Because I can help all of you! You guys are SO amazing! I can't wait to meet all of you!

You know, for someone I've just met, you're really energetic.

I just like to know more about people when I see them! Especially... them!

There's nothing you want to see here, trust me.

Is there something I should know about her, orr?

Yeah. But I wouldn't want to monologue, so I'll tell you later.

Teardrop stomps to the edge of a cliff and sits on the edge.

Gosh, those people sure want to get you to talk, huh? They just don't understand the appeal of silence. You know, there was a time when I never spoke, so I understand.

Teardrop faces Eggy in excitement.

I said, there was a time when I never spoke, so I understand!

Teardrop flutters her arms.

Well, you clearly aren't egging me on. I thought you'd be curious, but I guess not.

I guess I have to tell you a lot of stuff then, Eggy.

A lot of stuff?

Ooh, tell me, too.

Balloony, when did you get here?

Long story, I kind of just got caught in the middle of this when I was supposed to be guarding Cloudy's collection from "intruders".

Anyways... I've done some research, and I believe it means the person cares so little that the last droplets of care spirit are being sucked out of their body, through their arms, and out of the tips of their fingers, and into the outer reaches of interstellar space to be lost forever. A true indicator that person doesn't give a fluff.

Jeez, Teardrop is so hard to impress.

(Raising his hand.) I have a question!

Yes, Balloony?

This doesn't seem like something you did yourself, the handwriting on the whiteboard looks a lot like Liy's... and yours, of course.

How do you know that?

Eggy, I think it's better off if you calm down on the questions. They're meant for Pillow, and Pillow only!

Well, Balloony, me and Liy worked on this researching project together! So, you got something right there!

Teardrop, on the edge of the cliff, overhears Pillow say "Liy", as she then stomps towards Pillow's whiteboard and looks at it, infuriated.

Oh, hey Teardrop! It seems like you're interested in your own kind. May I ask why-

Teardrop flips the whiteboard on the ground, leaving it on there as she stomps away, almost exaggerated.

Sheesh. She isn't having it today.

Yeah, and I do see her footsteps from before... clear on the grass!

Good point, Eggy! If we trail back to Teardrop's original footsteps when she got to the edge of the cliff, then maybe we can find out what was upsetting her! Let's go, guys.

Pillow and Eggy walk together as Balloony darts his focus on them.

(Running.) Hooold up! Wait for me!

Barf Bag sees Balloony run to Pillow and Eggy as she sits by Stapy and Marker.

I wonder what has him all tied up. Literally.

What happened? I wasn't watching.

So, basically-

Hey, Stapy! Will you play dig the dirt with me?

Uhh... I dunno, Marker. I think we need a new companion.

Good idea! Barf Bag can dig with us!

I'm not really into that stuff, but you can show me how to do it. I hate getting my hands all grimey.

Aren't you grimey yourself?

I mean, I guess you can say that, but I wouldn't get so confident saying that to someone, Marker.

But I feel like we should hype up the digging! C'mon! Follow our moves!

Marker and Stapy dig into the ground, as Barf Bag sits there, looking at them.

I'll try to copy you guys!

Barf Bag digs into the ground with the rest of them, as Dora observes from above.

Dadadadadadadadada Translation: Digging! How novel. If I am to construct and produce islands for consumption, acquiring dirt in this jubilant manner seems most appropriate. *Singing and digging* ♪ Islands islands! Yum, yum, yum! Islands islands! Chomp. Islands! They are so delish! Gimme islands now! Gimme! Gimme, gimme, gimme! Gimme. Islands! Yum! Islands. Glorp! Shlorp! Gobble! Gloop! Gulp! Lala! Islands. Islands islands! Yum, yum, yum! Islands islands! Chomp. Islands! Yum. ♪

Dora unearths a jar of cyanide tablets.

I totally deserve this treasure.

Flower, wait a minute, is that cyanide?

Well, yeah! Something I've wanted for all these generations! Don't tell me you hate cyanide, Pencil. Do you?

Everyone hates cyanide! That's a dumb question, Flower.

Sorry. But, honesty doesn't hurt! Does it?

What hurts ME is talking to YOU!

Pencil, I've sprouted enough as a plant for me to learn from my mistakes, and I think I shouldn't call you dumb in exchange!

And?

I think you need to learn that as well.

Flower attempts to open the jar, failing.

Give me that and put it where it belongs!

Flower and Pencil tug on the cyanide each other, while Black Hole notices this. Bell flies in on it.

Oh, hey guys. What's going on?

Oh, nothing. It's just that some people are fighting over a jar of dangerous contents, and intents.

Yeah! And I'm trying to prevent that!

Pencil, politely, STOP! But, Black Hole, you're strong! Open this jar for me!

Mmm, I dunno, that sounds like a bad idea, for me to do that.

If... if you don't help me open it, I'll-I'll CRUSH YOU!

Well, yea, but like, I'm already inf-infinitely small, being a singularity-

JUST DO IT, BLACK HOLE!

...Uh, okay.

Black Hole approaches Earth.

Yes, yes, yes! It's WORKING!

UGH, NO!

The scene cuts back to Pillow, Eggy and Balloony walking as they see Black Hole approaching Earth.

What a peculiar sight.

Pillow lets herself get sucked in as Eggy watches in horror.

Of course SHE fell for it! And now we're going to die...

Eggy, I've always loved you.

WHAT?

Like, platonically, I-

Before Balloony could continue his sentence, they both get sucked up together. Black Hole caves in and the screen turns to black.

Everyone suddenly begins to get sucked into Black Hole. They try to prevent it, such as clinging to a pole (which doesn't work). Paper can be seen flying around from the suction force.

A mysterious, realistic hand surrounds Black Hole. It analyzes him by randomly doing slow rotations, around him, then finally, crushes Black Hole down to a smaller size. The camera zooms out but cuts to black for a second and reveals that the hand belongs to Four.

Intro plays.

Four and X arrive

Oh, cool. I've been crushed down to a smaller size.

What's this?

Maybe try giving it a squish?

AaaahhhhHHHH!!!!

Oh, yeah. This thing definitely has some creepy origins.

I think so, too.

What if I... FORK it?

I'm not an it!

Oh my glob, it talks.

What do you do anyways?

I do this!

A pleasant jingle plays as Four mutilates Foldy by turning her into a squiggle.

AAAAHHHH—

Pretty cool, don't you think.

I mean, I thought it was cool.

You seriously think that this thing is "cool"? It just killed someone.

Hey, I don't play by the rules, it's boring to me. It's better to stick out than fit in with all of the others.

Can you bring her back?

No.

But the recovery centers are gone. They got sucked up! Are you sure you can't-

Nope.

Please you gotta bring her back!

I hate to live in a world where recovery is impossible. Where we die forever!

Yeah. None of this can be excused, if we die, there's no coming back without our one, and only recovery spots. Four, whoever that other creature is-

Hello!

Find a way to save our lives!

There's another one?

Liy squishes X.

It totally has a different texture from the first one!

So what do you want, murderer?

*Screeching*

So what do you want, murderer?

*Scr-

No more screechy please.

*-eeches*

-.-. .- -. / -.-- --- ..- / ... .... --- .-- / ..- ... / -.-- --- ..- .-. / --- - .... . .-. / .- -... .. .-.. .. - .. . ... ..--..

Yeah, sounds totally reasonable, Roboty! CAN DO!

But what is it you can do? Remotes can't translate morse code.

Prolonged silence.

*Scr-

Four is attacked by Pillow, who disappears, in which Lightning, Puffball and Cloudy are shocked at it.

Cuts back to Four who is now standing, he blinks and his left arm disappears.

Sigh. I guess we'll never get Foldy or Pillow back...

Check THIS out!

Pillow, Foldy, Balloony and Eggy emerge from Four's hand.

And that was my platonic relationship with me and Eggy!

Yeah. Thanks for announcing that to literally everyone here, bulb-brain.

Everyone, including Four and X, stare at them.

Who even are these things, anyway?-

Let's play a game!

I LOVE GAMES! WHAT'S WRONG?!

Don't you want to battle to win a prize?

But what IS the prize?

A BFDI.

Contestants, including Teardrop (Excited chatting)

I love that prize—!

*Screeches*

Now form 8 teams of 8!

Creating the teams

It's too bad I don't care about that number at all.

Wanna be on the same team 'cause we're both balls?

Yeah. Let's adopt these three because they're balls too.

No, no way. There is no way I'm gonna be on this team of weak, armless-

Since there's already five of us in a truce, why don't we all form a team together?

Seems kinda risky. But hey, I'll take those odds.

Liy, I think you're forgetting the most protective one here!

Oh, and include Leafy too, I guess.

What?! Her?!

Hey, you did say you would tell me more about her, did you not?

Yeah, but it won't take a competition's worth of telling you!

But, we do need more people... one truce won't be our final team, will it? We need eight members.

(Picking up Book, opening her to a page.) Ooh!

Agh! Put me down!

Pillow shuts Book and puts her down, like what she had told her to do.

I was just looking at your images.

Does that excuse you for doing that?!

Book, if only you knew.

Huh?

Me and Pillow do research together! It's a given that she came to us because she knew we had to figure out Teardrop and her thoughts, and why she doesn't speak!

Yep.

And apparently that includes wiggling her vocal cords?

It's necessary when you have to find something out, like a secret just as ominous as that.

Pencil, weren't you the one who tried to prevent Flower from opening that can of cyanide?

Yeah? What about it?

That's a quality in someone that I like. Ones who care about risks other people take.

Listen, B-Hole, if you're trying to take me away from my alliance, you'll have to try harder. I only did that because Flower is such an ugly, hideous menace.

Yeah! We're, like, inseparable!

Oh, you're one of those people? That can't go onto another team because one can't be taken away from the other?

You're saying that like it's a common occurrence.

Hey! This is an A-B conversation! C your way out of it, Tree!

Bold of you to assume that I'm not on the same team as him, I value life as much as him. After all, I do hold oxygen.

Without it, we would all be dead.

I'd say I'm pretty good life source.

You guys are choke-holding this against my will, aren't you?

... Well... uhh... no?

I'll, like, give you some time to think about it, Pencil. I'll just get our other alliance members gathered in the meantime.

(Sighing) Meanwhile I'm here, rotting.

Ruby! Bubble! We should totes stick together.

YEAH!

Oh, I'm not so sure about that Match, this alliance has changed drastically, don't you think so too, Ruby?

What do you mean?

It's been so, uurrgghh, hostile! I keep thinking of leaving, but-

Leaving? A departure after all of these years of getting to know each other? You can, like, leave wherever you want to, but just know that you're demoted from member... to bember.

OUGH! That's terrible.

I don't know much about that, but I'll stay with you, Match!

Bubble runs away from Ruby and Match. They're left there in confusion, but Match is mostly shown to be disappointed.

Good. We wouldn't, like, want another loose one, anyways.

Gelatin throws a couple of forks as one lands in Cloudy.

Hey! Watch it!

My bad. Kinda hard to control my reflexes, you know? Heh-heh. Uhh, Cloudy? Hello?

You should take responsibility for your own actions.

But I did! (Hiding his forks behind his back.) I swear to use these forks properly.

Good.

Gelatin sees Rocky approach him as Gelatin slides one of his forks into his mouth.

GELATIN!

What? C'mon! Is it my fault that it looks cool?

Balloony approaches Cloudy, seeing Cloudy's visible frustration with him.

And you, what happened to guarding my collection?

Aww, I'm sorry Cloudy. I just got distracted in Pillow's theories! I know, I know... happens a lot. But I did bring a friend with me to make it up to you!

Ooh. A friend to collect?

Oh no.

Meet Eggy! I don't know if she's the chicken type, or the egg type, but either way, yeah! She can join our team.

You're acting like I agreed to this.

But you did! We walked together... we... we did so much!

We did, so I'll let this pass... only this time. One more fluke and you're done for.

Balloony gulps.

... Hmmm.

What'cha thinking about, Gaty?

Something about Four and X... do you think it's weird that Four can understand Roboty? I mean, he speaks in morse code, while that thing speaks our language!

Hmph. I guess it is a little suspicious if you put it like that.

Wait, why is Golf Ball there?

Huh? Golf Ball?

Yes, I would like to take Roboty so that I can use him for mechanical advances! Ensuring that my team's success is prone to happen.

You'll have to guess the password then.

Four, you don't UNDERSTAND! This is for the importance of the people I'll be with for the rest of the season! If I don't want to be up for elimination again, I have to get teammates who know what they're doing!

Golf Ball, I think we have a problem.

What is it, TB?

We have a certain... masculine mind on our team.

Of course I'm with nerdy-nerd-nerdy over here!

Seriously?! Out of any option, you chose HIM?! He has a weight for his brain! Don't... take that as a compliment...

I didn't have a say in anything! 8-Ball said so.

RRGH! Fine! If I have TWO buffoons on my team!-

I teamed up with 8-Ball 'cause we were alike! Don't put any shade to me, because I think us balls will be useful.

-Three buffoons on our team... then I'll take a USEFUL mind that wouldn't hesitate to do an order I give them! Roboty, welcome to the team.

.. / -.. .. -.. -. .----. - / .- ... -.- / ..-. --- .-. / - .... .. ... .-.-.-

It's sad that people like her use us mechanical minds as advantages for simple tasks they can't do themselves.

TV! We... uhh, actually need to use you for a sec. Can you give us directions on where to find Lollipop and Taco?

Oh, yeah. They're by the bathrooms over... there.

Thank you, TV!

This is the kind of treatment I'm talking about.

TV, we need you for-

TV turns himself off in a hurry.

... Okay?